The Bill

Diagnosis: cracked radiator and dead thermostat. $800+ to replace both. Further testing revealed no engine damage "at this time". Hmmm.

Also spotted: broken engine mount, burned out brake light bulb, leaking oil pan gasket. I debated briefly about postponing the gasket replacement, but went ahead. At least the bulb replacement was cheap.

Grand total: $1350. Let's not count the AAA upgrade for extra towing, the rental car, and the extra parking at the airport.